


Avengers: Fanfiction

by sv4me



Category: Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, The Avengers (2012), The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-25
Updated: 2013-01-25
Packaged: 2017-11-26 21:18:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/654509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sv4me/pseuds/sv4me
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Avengers discover fanfiction.  Hilarity, feels, drama, romance, smut, and maybe some action ensue.  Mainly Clint & Natasha, some Tony/Pepper and the whole team.  Rated M for later chapters.<br/>PS, this was written for fanfiction.net, before AO3 existed.  The stories referenced may not be here on AO3.  </p>
<p>A/N:  In this story the team has come together again and Stark has put them up in the now “Avengers Tower.”  At least some amount of time has passed since the first movie, and Clint has recovered from the mind control, & is back to his joking self.  He and Natasha still haven’t admitted their feelings for each other, however.  Silly Clintasha.  (I’m sure it’ll all end up being AU after the next few movies probably)  <br/>I don’t own anything.  Just using these characters for discussion & to promote the movie & the comics.  This Chapter is rated “T” for swearing and discussing fan fiction pairings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Avengers: Fanfiction

Chapter 1: Pancakes and fan fiction

xxxxxxxxxx

Natasha loved Saturday morning rituals.

Every Saturday morning possible she would sleep in one extra hour. Then, after using the restroom, brushing her teeth, running a brush through her hair and throwing on sweats and a t-shirt she would stretch as she watched the sun come up over the city. Being ‘friends’ with a billionaire had its perks, and one of the best views in New York was one of them. Next she would grab a book and wander out to what the team had been using as a commons area. There would sit a steaming hot cup of coffee and pancakes with real syrup waiting for her, with a handsome archer with sleep ruffled hair and an apron that read “kiss the cook.” Somehow he could always time it just right so everything was warm and waiting for her. 

As always, he was nursing his coffee and hadn’t starting on his own stack of pancakes yet. Seeing her enter the room his trademark grin flashed across his face and he greeted her with the same words he’d used when they first started this little routine, “good morning dear.” 

“In your dreams, Barton.” Yes, some routines are comforting.

“Mmmm, you sure were, baby.”

She sat down next to Clint without another word and opened her book. Steve was dumbfounded. He had watched this little practice every Saturday for months now, since the entire team had agreed to move into Stark tower. He had wondered why they bothered coming to the commons area; why they didn’t make this their own private ritual, as each Avenger had their own apartment. Granted, the apartment kitchens were tiny and Stark had called them “guest suites” instead of individual apartments, but it was the nicest place Steve had ever lived. He even had a guest room in his “guest suite!” No, they were apartments, built around a beautiful and spacious commons area complete with a giant flat screen tv, pool table, fully-stocked and professional kitchen, and grand dining table. Thor had even hailed it as worthy of a grand feast of Asgard, and promised to bring his family one day. Thankfully that mess had yet to transpire. 

But, Clint and Natasha were their own animal. They were so clearly meant for each other, but refused to admit it, even to themselves. Sometimes that infuriated Steve, that they would take such a thing for granted. He hadn’t had the chance with Peggy. They shouldn’t waste their chance. They shouldn’t take each other for granted. 

But, he had to consider who they were, and their extremely heart-breaking pasts and, especially childhoods. Looking at it through that lens, Steve could begin to understand why it was so difficult for them, especially Natasha, to open themselves to the vulnerability that is love. Honestly, when he considered it, he pitied them. He wished he could do something, but he didn’t want to interfere or push them past their emotional capabilities.

Stark, on the other hand, did not keep in mind such considerations of politeness and boundaries when addressing the two. Over the last few months his, well, ‘winning personality’ had focused its attention on the resident SHIELD agents. Natasha had finally learned to deal with it without drawing a gun. Clint, however, had been taking Stark to task. Who knew the archer could banter like that! Well, Natasha likely. But Clint had been slow to come out of his shell after the ‘New York Incident’ and Loki. After he had finally accepted that his team members and comrades didn’t blame him for his role in the death and destruction wrought by Loki, it had taken him even longer to forgive himself. 

Perhaps that was why Natasha had insisted he cook for her in the commons. It brought him out of his ‘nest,’ and back into the world of the living. Plus it brought him into direct contact with Stark, who would not rest his mouth until he had pancakes of his own. The endless banter had seemed to be cathartic for Clint.

Speaking of…

“Awe, BlackHawk has landed, and provided a bounty of pancakes!” 

Banner rolled his eyes, Natasha didn’t even look up from her coffee, and Clint smirked. “Blackhawk now, eh Stark? That the best you could do?”

“Well, you know Katniss,” the billionaire started as he made his way to the kitchen bar where the two sat. “I can only do so much without my morning coffee. Speaking of…”

He was looking at Natasha’s coffee. Bad move. Before he could even begin to reach towards the cup she had been neglecting, and without even looking up from the book, she produced a knife from god-knows-where and thrust it into the beautiful redwood counter inches from her cup. 

“Dammit Natasha! That’s the fifth time this month! You know, it doesn’t always buff out!” 

She only chuckled, still not looking up from her book. Clint responded for her. “Man, you’re lucky she gave you the warning and didn’t just put it through your hand.” 

“Yeah yeah ok. The hazards of living with assassins I guess.” He moved towards the stove. “Remind me again why I keep you two around?”

“Pancakes.” Natasha stated simply, her mouth full with the same. Clint just chuckled.

“Didn’t your evil Russian trainers ever teach you not to talk with your mouth full, Romanov?”

“Quite enough, Tony,” Pepper’s entry was right on time, and calming enough to take Tony down at least one notch, before he found himself in trouble. She walked into the kitchen, and found the batter that Clint had prepared for everyone but not cooked up yet. It was like that every Saturday - he would only cook for him and Nat, but prepped enough for everyone. “Ok if I cook these up Clint?”

“Not a problem, Pep.” 

“Now that’s a gentlemen, doing all the prep for his friends.” Pepper was doing it again, teasing Tony with the accomplishments of the other men in the building. This should be fun. At least it would take his attention off of Clint and Natasha for a while.

Tony responded with a dejected look. “Ms. Potts, you wound me. And don’t flirt with the Hawk, I don’t want to rush you to the hospital with a deadly spider bite.”  
So much for that plan. 

“And why does he get to call you Pep, and if I try to call The Black Widow by any nickname at all I take my life into my own hands?” Tony strutted over to the two assassins. Brave, but stupid. “Why does HE get to call you anything under the sun, including “baby?” 

Clint put his head in his hands, groaning. Natasha set down the book, looking into Tony’s eyes with a look of amused indifference. Pepper did her best to avert attention one more time.

“If you guys would like to take a seat at the table I’ll have pancakes up in just a minute.” The lovely smell as the batter hit the pan wafted throughout the room. Steve and Bruce moved to sit at the large table, while Tony leaned against the kitchen bar, doing his best to stare down Natasha. 

“And sweet cheeks…” she cocked her head to the side ever so slightly. Clint started to fake-weep into his hands.

Stark leaned forward, getting into her space. He looked up with what was supposed to be an attempt at seduction. “And beautiful…”

Before anyone could blink Natasha had flipped over the counter, over Stark, and had him on his back on the ground. Pepper jumped, mid-pancake flip, and the food fell to the floor. Instead of pressing a gun to his temple or a knife to his throat, this time Natasha calmly walked back to her seat and resumed her reading like nothing had happened. 

“Because he’s gotten fast enough to counter me, Stark. You, on the other hand, have not.” 

Clint gave Tony his best “What can I do?” look as he got up from the kitchen floor, groaning. 

Tony pointed at Clint. “YOU need to stop encouraging her.”

“What did I say?!”

“Nothing.”

“Exactly!”

“Exactly.”

“Oh, come on, you two!” Pepper was getting annoyed as she wiped up a pancake from the floor. “It’s like living with a couple of five year olds. Can’t we just have a lovely quiet Saturday morning with cartoons or something?”

Thor emerged from his apartment, having arrived very late the night before after visiting a certain scientist. For a moment everyone watched him, thinking he would go turn on Saturday morning cartoons. He was especially entertained by an “Avengers” cartoon. That sure hadn’t taken long. This time he sat at the table next to Steve, still groggy. 

“Arrived for the feast, Thor?”

“Indeed, lady Pepper. I intend to take advantage of every opportunity that the warrior Hawk prepares the Feast of Pancakes. I appreciate your assistance in their preparation as well, m’lady. It will be a fine feast indeed.”

The pile of pancakes by the stove was growing tall. Much was needed to feed this motley crew. 

“Tony, why don’t you go sit at the table with the other gentlemen,” began Pepper.

“What, and leave Clintasha alone? I think they need a chaperone Pep.”

Steve spoke up this time. “That’s a new one Stark. Come up with that all on your own?”

“Actually, Capsicle,” Tony began with a very mischievous look on his face. “That one I found online. At a lovely little site that features fan-fiction.” Tony walked over to the table, Clint and Natasha watched him, interested now. Clint looked confused.

“Wait a minute. Someone out there on the internet called us that?” 

Tony snickered. “Oh, it gets even better than that, BlackEye. Jarvis, table monitor please.”

“Yes sir.” The center of the table lit up, showing what appeared to be a desktop configuration. 

Tony fiddled with a few things until a website filled the screen. It was a simple site, no flashy colors or pictures, and the team gathered around to watch him as he signed in.

“Tonyisawesome. Such an original sign-on name Stark.”

“Hey now, Banner. I tried a lot of other stuff, and it was already taken! Like Tonyissexy, Ironman4me, IloveTonyStark, it goes on and on!”

“What exactly is this Stark?” Natasha was starting to sound concerned. Clint looked over at her, then looked her up and down. He couldn’t help it. She was bending over the table looking at the monitor. Even wearing baggy sweats and a t-shirt she was amazing. He actually preferred her in this, especially when she wore one of his old shirts. It was chauvinistic and possessive and she’d kill him if he told her but he loved it. Even when they slept together and they never actually slept together because it was just to keep the nightmares at bay, he’d still toss her one of his t-shirts. Sometimes she’d roll her eyes and wear it. Sometimes he imagined she’d even smell it as she put it on. He sure as hell did later when she took it off.

“This, my friends, is fan-fiction. Ever since the New York Incident,” Tony used his fingers to emphasize the title that SHIELD had given to the Avengers saving the world, “people have been going crazy speculating about us. Well, some people decided they’d just dream up their own little fantasies of how our lives should be, and they write up little stories. Avengers fan-fiction was born.”

“What are they writing? Who are they writing about?” Steve sounded amused but also concerned.

“Well, pretty much everyone and everything.” A huge grin exploded across Tony’s face. “Apparently it’s trendy to pair Loki with everyone, including Thor.”  
Bruce made a slight gagging noise, Steve gasped, Clint and Natasha exchanged glances, and Thor looked thoroughly confused. “What is this ‘pairing’ you speak of, sir Stark?”

Oh boy. This should be interesting.

A look of slight embarrassment spread across Tony’s face. “Well, um, it’s kindof like…”

Pepper sighed. “Don’t mind the crazy people on the internet Thor. They pair up everyone and write what they’d like to see if the couple was romantic. It’s silly and we should just move on with a lovely breakfast.” She sat down a huge plate of towering pancakes. “Don’t you all agree?”

But it was too late now. All Avengers, sans Tony, were shocked at this new revelation. “But my friends, Loki and I are brothers! Is this strange connection between siblings common amongst midgardians?”

Steve was quick to respond. “No! No, Thor, it’s just that, on the internet, people are, well…”

“And this internet that you speak of, is that a form of portal?”

Oh dear God.

“Hey so Bruce why don’t you explain the finer points of technology to Thor later,” Banner bowed his head in reluctant acceptance, “and we move on to the main attraction and the whole reason I mentioned this at all!” 

Tony started typing into the search box. Clint and Natasha saw their names entered. Natasha suddenly went pale. Clint noticed. Clint swallowed. Natasha noticed.  
The page exploded with a long list of ‘stories,’ all with names or descriptions depicting the two spies. Well, looks like former spies now.

“Oh my god.”

**Author's Note:**

> OK, first chapter. What do you think? Please review! They make me feel special and happy  Flames will be burned, fyi, but constructive criticism is AWESOME.  
> PS I swear I had the idea for Clint being good at pancakes before I read it in like 100 other fics. Guess it’s generally accepted that a guy as awesome as Clint would be good at pancakes.


End file.
